Friday, August 10, 2012

Hour One

When you are raising a child that was birthed (and partially raised) by someone else, it is sometimes difficult to know what "normal" is like.  So many therapy appointments.  So many people who can't see past the behavior issues to the truly amazing child that lies beneath.  So many events that you pass on being at because your child just can't handle being a part of that kind of chaos. So many times that you worry if you have made the right choice.   Well I guess any parent has those worries.

Then you are around a child who has been raised in a loving home.  A child who...  had you birthed and raised the children you are parenting from hour one, you would have nurtured in the same way.  A child who is allowed to explore the world around them.  To sate the curiosity that is burning a hole le in their little minds.  A child who is encouraged to talk, and giggle.  A child who is not chastised for crying.  A child who doesn't question the love of the adults in her young life.... because she has never once been taught to doubt that.

It is so surreal being around this "normal" child.  Witnessing how smart and happy she is.  Wishing that your sister could have given that to the children you are now parenting.  Wondering how much more enriched your children's lives would be had they had that nurturing love from hour one. 

But again, I am faced with the bold truth.  I can't go back in time.  I can't change anything that ever happened to these angels.  I can only embrace today, and move forward.  I can only give those children all that love and compassion.  I can only try to help the caregivers and teachers who can't see the amazing children that I see... how to see them.  But I assume this is a struggle for many parents.  Most teachers and caregivers are taxed to the limit, and it is rare to find one that truly takes an interest in your child.

Speaking of caregivers taking an interest in your child.  Vampire is starting Kindergarten next week!  So, next week will be the last week of daycare.  She told me this morning that she is sad, and she would rather just stay in daycare for the rest of her life than start school.  She told me that she didn't want to leave Miss Michelle.  I just hugged her and told her that we will stay in touch with Miss Michelle, and visit the daycare as often as we can, because I know Miss Michelle will miss her too.  Michelle has been so loving and patient with V.  Michelle had to tolerate V biting her many times because V was not getting her way, but Michelle never treated V differently.  I wish I knew how to thank her.  Talking to Michelle, I can tell that she truly loves our little V, and it just melts my heart.

On the school front, they have our girls going to two different schools.  It will be difficult to get them to both places at once, so we are not free from daycare like we had hoped.  We will be paying a little less, though.  DQ will go to before and after school care at a local daycare.  They will take her to and from school for us - freeing M and I up so that we can make sure we get V dropped off and picked up in time.  HOPEFULLY after Labor Day, V will be accepted to the same school we have enrolled DQ in, and we won't have to go two separate places. 

I opted not to purchase dance photos from the company that took pictures.  I felt that the woman was way too expensive.  One of my dear friends gifted us a photo shoot for my birthday in June, and tomorrow we will be having the girls photos taken at a local park in their dance costumes.  I will share my favorites with you when we get them in!  Dance season starts up the end of this month for DQ.  She will be starting competition dance, and I couldn't be more proud of her.  V says she wants to dance again this year, and that she wants to tumble.  So that is what we are going to let her do.  It will be DQ's 4th year dancing, and V's 3rd!   Time sure is flying....

Aunt TT

1 comment:

  1. I have read every entry on your blog and am amazed by your selflessness. I just have one thing to say: the fact that you are constantly asking yourself if you're doing the right thing for them and worrying all the time is what makes you a great parent. Bad parents don't second guess themselves. :)

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